Totems

Alright, let’s talk about this… this… “toteme silk set,” whatever that fancy name means. I saw some pictures online, you know, on that Facebook thing my grandson showed me. Looked kinda nice, like somethin’ you could wear to a fancy shindig, or maybe just around the house if you’re feelin’ extra special. Now, I ain’t no fashion expert, mind you. I wear what’s comfortable and what keeps me covered. But this silk set, it got me thinkin’. They say it’s “versatile,” which I guess means you can wear it a…

Alright, let’s talk about this here coat, the one they call “Toteme Signature.” I ain’t no fancy fashion lady, ya know? I just like things that keep me warm and don’t fall apart after a few washes. But this coat… well, it’s somethin’ else. First off, it’s warm. Like, real warm. They say it’s made of wool and some other fancy stuff, cashmere they call it. Don’t know much about that, but I know it feels nice and thick. Keeps the wind right out, which is important when you gotta…

Alright, let’s talk about this here Toteme quilted coat. Folks been yappin’ about it, so I figured I’d put in my two cents, ya know? Don’t expect no fancy words from me, I just call it like I see it. Now, this coat, they say it’s “oversized.” Means it’s big, real big. Like you could fit a whole ‘nother person in there with ya, maybe even two scrawny chickens. That ain’t necessarily a bad thing, mind you. Comes winter, you can layer up underneath like nobody’s business. Wear a sweater,…

Alright, let’s gab about them Toteme Loafers, shall we? Folks keep jawin’ about ’em, so I figured, why not? Now, I ain’t no fancy pants, but I know comfy shoes when I see ’em. And these here loafers, they look right comfy. First off, what in tarnation is a loafer anyway? Well, near as I can tell, it’s a slip-on shoe. No laces to fuss with, which is a godsend, let me tell ya. My fingers ain’t what they used to be, and tyin’ shoes is a pain in the…

Alright, let’s talk about these Toteme hats, you know, the ones all them fancy city gals are wearin’. I ain’t no fashion expert, mind you, just an old woman who knows a thing or two about keepin’ the sun outta my eyes and the cold off my head. First off, what’s the big deal with hats anyway? Well, lemme tell ya, back in my day, a hat was just a hat. You wore it to keep warm or to keep the sun off your face while you were workin’ in…

Hey there, y’all! Let’s talk about gettin’ some deals, you know, savin’ a bit of cash. We’re gonna jaw about somethin’ called a “toteme discount code.” Don’t you go frettin’ if it sounds fancy, it ain’t. It’s just a way to get a little somethin’ knocked off the price when you’re buyin’ stuff, simple as that. Now, I ain’t no spring chicken, and I sure ain’t tech-savvy, but even I can figger this stuff out. These “codes,” they’re like secret words, see? You tell ’em to the store folks, or…

Alright, alright, let’s talk about this… this totem woodpecker thing, ya know? Don’t go thinkin’ I’m some fancy expert, I’m just tellin’ ya what I’ve heard and seen, the way us plain folk understand it. What’s a Totem, Anyway? First off, this “totem” word, it just means somethin’ special, somethin’ that represents a family or a group of people. Like, back in the day, folks used to have animals or plants or what have you, as their kinda symbol, ya follow? So, a totem woodpecker, well, that just means the…

Well, howdy there! Let me tell ya ’bout this here Totem Tribe game, or whatever they call it. It’s a kinda thing where you gotta build up your own little group, like a family but bigger, ya know? They call ’em tribes. First off, I heard tell there’s this Hawk Tribe, and you gotta help this lady, Aruku I think her name was. She’s the boss, and she wants her people to do good, real good. Like, have plenty to eat, a good place to live, and no fighting with…

Alright, let’s talk about this “totem series” thing, whatever that is. Sounds fancy, like somethin’ them city folks would watch on their big tellies. I ain’t got no fancy telly, mind you, just a little one that gets the job done. What’s this “Totem” all about, huh? Well, from what I gathered, it’s some kinda show, a “series” they call it. Seems like there’s different kinds, too. One’s about wolves and woods, and another one’s got spies and secret stuff going on. Like them James Bond movies, but maybe not…

Alright, let’s talk about this Totem Pole Panicum grass, ya know, the one they call switchgrass too. I ain’t no fancy gardener, but I’ve been around plants long enough to know a thing or two. This here grass, it’s kinda like them tall poles the Injuns used to make, stands right up straight, kinda proud like. First off, where does this thing come from? Well, they say it grows all over, from up in Canada, way down south into Mexico. So, it ain’t no delicate flower, that’s for sure. It…